OK... Success (I think

)
I went back to the resistors, keeping only the trimmer subbing for the 390 Ohm. On a whim, I swapped out all the NPN trannies for 2N5088's and kept the 2N3406 in the PNP. After several hours of poking and proding, and head scratching trying to understand the inter relationships between the trimmers, I FINALLY got all the voltages to within +/- 0.1 volt (for the major base voltages) of what you laid out on the schematic. And yes, tranny 5 is conducting, and sitting at 0.585v now. All the other voltages are very, very close.
This is one fizzy fuzzy buzzy crispy sizzly fuzz circuit. Almost a la Fuzz Factory, but crispier. Did I mention sizzly. Oh yeah, and it's real crispy too.
Was probably way to radical for anyone back in the day. Hell, sounds pretty radical to me now. It almost sounds like I'm playing my guitar through a Tesla coil amplifier. Think the Stones "Satisfaction", but with steam roller running over a million bags of tuned Doritos every time you play the hook. And I'm pretty sure that I know when the guy 5 doors down turns on his flourescent lights as well.
But the funniest thing was last night, while I was playing with it... I had the headphones on, since everyone was sleeping, and while I was tuning the trimmer, it suddenly came over the headphones that my favorite hockey team had lost again
Really not your run of the mill fuzz circuits. The PNP/NPN section really adds a lot of harsh nastiness to the sound. Just pure evil dirt. I wish there was a way to tame it, but I did find that an AC128 in the PNP spot seemed to make a bit of a difference. Somewhat less harsh. Hmmm....
The EDGE switch basically boosts, or lowers you treble. The DRIVE switch fattens the low end a bit with the EDGE on high, but with the EDGE off, and DRIVE off, there is a significant loss of volume. DRIVE on, EDGE off leans toward a nervous chihuahua Muffy type sound.
The ATTACK pot really is a killjoy at any setting other than wide open, pedal in the oil pan, max. Below that, the presence, sustain, and fuzzy fizziness, quickly fall by the wayside.
I would really like to know if anyone else tries this circuit, just to corroborate my findings. This thing is... umm... special. I'm surprised it hasn't shown up on a Black Keys album yet.
Many. many, many thanks to Grizzlytone for the pointers (and enduring my noobishness). Thanks to you, I go to bed less stupid at night. And that's where i'm headed now. Goodnight all!